The Donut Guy Blog

My partner and I are easily entertained. Over the past few years together, we’ve learned that the simple things make us happiest. Since we’ve both been married before—and we each have kids—we knew we didn’t need a grand production this time around. What we wanted was a celebration: something warm, genuine, and full of the people we love. That’s when I realized something surprising. In our relationship, I’m the Primadonna.

I work with weddings often, so of course I’ve built up opinions. The first time I got married, I was young and didn’t think much about the details. Now, after officiating and attending so many ceremonies, I knew what I liked, what I didn’t, and where I wanted to land.

One thing was clear: I didn’t want to elope. I’ve been lucky to meet and love people from all walks of life, and I wanted to share the day with as many of them as possible—without going broke. That meant something bigger than a Vegas Elvis wedding, but still rooted in simplicity.

We found a venue in Lyn’s hometown, run by people she already trusted. Brooke, Ty and their team at Rustic Ties were incredible—friendly, flexible, and even employing classmates and friends of our kids. We told them the essentials: gluten-free food, no strong opinions about napkins or décor, and a preference for keeping things simple. They rolled with it completely. It helps that their Dolgeville, NY space is naturally beautiful: rustic, warm, and welcoming.

We didn’t go with a florist or stress about color palettes. Instead, Lyn’s mom—who helps with the local farmers market—connected us to someone selling wildflowers. A quick conversation later, we had everything we needed: bud vases, boutonnieres, and bouquets. I dusted off my old floral training to pull it together, and it felt like hopping back on a bike. One pro tip: don’t hand your bouquet-allergic fiancé too many flowers. They’ll feel better once you stop.

Our officiant was Levon, a dear friend, business partner, and brother from another mother. He’s done weddings before, and he struck the perfect balance: heartfelt and hilarious. Yes, we got Rick Rolled in the middle of the ceremony, and no, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.

Every vendor we worked with shared that same spirit of simplicity. Our photographer is a friend and fellow educator who’s captured family photos for years. The music, sound, and karaoke came from a team in Syracuse I’d trusted before. When we met with anyone, we said the same thing: we just want to have fun, we don’t have a lot of specifics. They all rolled with it, exactly as we hoped.

On the day itself, I couldn’t have asked for more. It was simple, but it overflowed with humor, emotion, and love. Our kids looked as amazing as they are on the inside. My bride took my breath away and made me cry when I saw her in her dress. We danced, we laughed, and we celebrated with the people who mean the most.

And really, it can be that simple—if that’s what you want. A wedding can be you and four friends in a park, crying through vows. It can be something more elaborate if that fits you better. But it doesn’t have to be complicated just because tradition says so. As Lyn likes to remind me: “We’re in our forties, so we can do what we want.” I’d argue that’s true at any age. Create the wedding that feels right for you—even if it’s simple.